Avoid These 3 Common Mistakes When Asking for a Promotion, According to INSEAD Negotiation Expert

Preparing for a Promotion Discussion

Asking for a promotion can be intimidating, but navigating the process successfully is a critical skill, especially in the workplace. Horacio Falcão, a negotiation professor at INSEAD, stresses that people often approach these discussions with the wrong mindset. Instead of focusing on pushing through a predetermined solution, he advises focusing on becoming a better negotiator by enhancing emotional intelligence, patience, empathy, and preparation.

Here are three common mistakes employees should avoid when negotiating for a promotion:

1. Moving Too Fast

Falcão’s first piece of advice is to avoid waiting until the annual review to ask for a promotion. He argues that waiting for a formal evaluation is a mistake because trust needs time to build. Rather than rushing into the conversation at the end of the year, employees should initiate discussions about their career development early on.

Falcão suggests regularly meeting with supervisors—whether through coffee chats or one-on-one meetings. These conversations allow employees to gather feedback and improve throughout the year while also helping to strengthen relationships with their bosses. Furthermore, they provide an opportunity to clearly express career ambitions. A proactive approach could sound like: “I’m excited about growing here. I’m ready to put in the effort to be the next person up. What do I need to do?”

2. Not Asking Questions

Negotiations can be high-pressure situations, often leaving individuals unsure of how to respond. Falcão advises that if you find yourself at a loss for words, take a pause and ask questions instead. Doing so can help you better understand the context and ensure a more productive conversation. Here are three key questions Falcão recommends:

1. “How did you come up with that number?”
   If offered a salary or position figure, it’s important to understand the reasoning behind it. Falcão explains that numbers are often based on formulas or internal benchmarks, but the specifics matter to assess whether the offer is fair.
2. “Why would you do this if you were me?”
   This question encourages empathy and offers a chance to see things from the other party’s perspective. It can also expose gaps in the employer’s reasoning or provide insight into the company’s budget constraints.
3. “How are we doing?”
   Long negotiations can sometimes lead to disconnection or emotions running high. Falcão recommends checking in with this question to assess where the conversation stands and to create space for both sides to reset and continue in a more productive direction.

3. Having a Too Clear Idea of Success

Another mistake Falcão warns against is having a rigid, predefined notion of success. He explains that negotiation is inherently messy and involves co-constructing a solution with the other side. Many people mistakenly think that one party must “win” while the other “loses.” In reality, successful negotiations often result in a compromise or a mutually beneficial outcome.

The key to effective negotiation is listening and being willing to collaborate to find a win-win solution. Flexibility and openness are crucial, as the process may lead to a different but equally valuable outcome than originally envisioned.

Conclusion

By avoiding these common mistakes—moving too quickly, failing to ask insightful questions, and insisting on a rigid outcome—employees can enhance their chances of successfully negotiating a promotion. Ultimately, the goal is to foster a collaborative and open environment where both sides work toward a mutually beneficial result.